Spooktacular Extravaganza: When Chipmunks Attack!

[yarrharr]

As the party carries on, the storm outside has worked into a frenzy. The wind howls and bellows and the water at lasts breaches the top deck. Beneath the waves, the shadows move, converging upon one single point and suddenly...

BAM!

The Black Tide shudders at the impact, water spilling through the cracks made in its hull. A leathery appendage pushes against the damage, seeking entry before it is finally swatted away in favor of something a little more dramatic.

Another BOOM rocks the boat and finally its hull is breached. The tentacle slithers in and begins to crush whatever it can wrap itself around.

As passengers right themselves, and food is quickly cleaned from the floor and walls, Rowe turns to Iseul and Mica, her face red and eyes wild, pointing sharply at the door. "Well? What are you waiting for, you bastards? FIX THIS!"

When they are gone, Rowe snatches up her goblet and drains it dry until the very last drop. When she sets it down, the chipmunks attack.

((The chipmunks are enormous! As they swarm into the Pourhouse, passengers will be scooped up and packed into their cheeks or stuffed into their fannypacks! Have fun with that. IMPORTANT MOD EDIT!!! We totally forgot to mention that any passenger successfully nabbed and taken away by a chipmunk will be automatically dropped. Where are they going? Nobody knows! If you would like to drop your character, here's your chance!))

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[dogfighting]

Last year, it was cardinals. This year, it's... giant rodents. It's like Lily said to Bennett: same shit, different day. Still, she's no less surprised when a seemingly peaceful party is interrupted by a myriad of chipmunks. The party dissolves into chaos--some people are screaming, some people are fighting back.

She turns around, and a chipmunk looms over her. These things are truly gargantuan. Lily could easily get stuffed into that little fannypack. The chipmunk leans down, reaching out to grab Lily with its tiny arms.

There's only one thing she can do. She has to emulate Rude.

Lily strengthens her stance.

Reels back.

And throws a punch to the side of the chipmunk's face.

[yarrharr]

The rodent's jaw cracks and shatters with the force behind the experiment's punch. It lets out a high pitched screech of agony, and it doesn't know what to do - does it wash? Does it keep trying to stuff the little girl in its mouth? Does it run away?

It turns to Lily with its big, moist, black eyes. Pupils so massive that the little girl could see her reflection in them. The chipmunk's gaze is soulful and hurt. It sniffs rapidly in its pain and cowers.

Why would you do such a thing, little girl?

[dogfighting]

Oh fuck.

She just punched an innocent animal.

Lily is taken aback for a few seconds, not sure what to do. What if it's a trick? It has to be a trick. It's just waiting for her to let her guard down so it can eat her. ... But if that slack jaw is any indication, there's no way this chipmunk can eat her. Not now.

Lily has a soft spot for animals. And she just Rude-punched one.

"Hey..." she says softly. The chipmunk cowers when she steps forward. Fuck! "I'm so sorry, you scared me!"

[yarrharr]

The tiny rodent brain behind the wide, staring eyes comes to a conclusion. Oh, the human child is docile now. It reaches out, picks her up, and begins trying to figure out how best to stuff her in its fannypack.

[dogfighting]

"HEY--"

Lily kicks her feet, but it's futile. This is completely unreasonable! She can't get shoved in a fannypack! Any sympathy she had for this big fucking vermin is gone. She pries open the chipmunk's little (in proportion!) fingers, uncaring if she breaks them in the process, and drops back to the ground.

Now what? Should she punch it again? Where the hell are the kill spots on a rodent? She watches the chipmunk warily, weighing her options. Last time she fought a giant animal like this, she gouged its eyes out. Is that a good idea?

... She doesn't think she could bring herself to rip out a chipmunk's eyes.

[nonhuman]

All right. Bennett Marrow knew, for a fact, that he had not had THAT MUCH to drink. He knew that the alcohol had affected him much more than usual, but it became abundantly clear that this was not some trick of the booze, or the light, or the bizarre dripping blood.

The tentacle? That was almost expected. Ben's most effective line of action was to strip off his damn costume once and for all, throw it at the tentacle, and sprint in the opposite fucking direction.

Of course, the opposite direction contained chipmunks, and that was really the honest-to-God plot twist of the evening.

A chipmunk grabs the werewolf by the ankle and hoists him into the air, and starts to shovel him feet-first into its cheeks. Flailing and shouting the whole time, Ben kicks his legs apart to get some leverage between the giant rodent's jaws, hangs backwards out of its mouth to grab a barstool and unceremoniously bash the bastard over the head with it. The professor lands on the floor in a drool-y, sweaty heap, only managing to escape another lunge from the creature by inches. He scuttles away, slipping and sliding in the spit now soaking his shoes, grabs another chair and starts swinging it at anything mildly rodent-ish that he sees.

[yarrharr]

It twitches its little rodent nose, whiskers moving from side to side as it considers the passenger. The chipmunk has gotten a taste for Ben, now. He has a very earthy, wild flavor. Smokey, with just a hint of nutmeg.

Nutmeg. The chipmunk began to wash. Nutmeg was its favourite.

It pursues, reaching out to grab him, in spite of his chair.

[nonhuman]

"J-JESUS FUCK GET AWAY FROM ME!" Huh. Interesting to know that his voice could reach a pitch that may or may not shatter glass. Bennett shakes the chair violently at the beast and squawks in something that is probably half terror, half indignation when it pursues anyway.

Something snaps in the back of his head, a little like a guitar string breaking mid-song. Flight instinct lurches violently into the instinct to fight back, and Bennett SLAMS the chair into the side of the chipmunk's head, cracking its wooden legs in the process.

Oh, jesus, he's normally much more compassionate about anything nonhuman, and here he is screaming pitchy, bloody murder while wailing on one. Then again, after the original werewolf mauling and the bullshit he went through back home a month ago? He is absolutely terrified of getting eaten.

Or the chance of getting eaten.

Or even being in something else's mouth.

He smacks the chipmunk again for good measure.

[yarrharr]

The chipmunk screeches as it is cast aside by the chair smackdown. It is thrown onto its side, where Bennett continues to beat the woodland creature for its offense of... what did it do to deserve this cruelty, Ben? The madness is clear in the werewolf's eyes. It can see the wildness in the depths of them.

If it could perceive of the concept of spirituality, the chipmunk would be praying in vain to its God(s) for either mercy or salvation.

[butcherofblaviken]

Geralt is having a fine conversation and he's more than a little drunk when a hole appears in the side of the ship--complete with storm and weather. That's anxiety-provoking enough, but now Geralt has to deal with a giant tentacle, too. It slithers inside and crushes a table of sweets into kindling.

Geralt's hand reflexively reaches for his sword and it's not there.

"Shit," Geralt curses and he starts grabbing whatever steak knives he can get his hands on. The party has a buffet and there's a butcher's knife there. He grabs that out of the roast and, in his drunken state, decides that he really should go after the tentacle. Of course, that's when the giant rodents attack and start stuffing passengers in their mouths. Geralt is appalled. This is exactly what creatures like him were created to prevent and he doesn't even have his sword. Shit.

Geralt immediately goes to help whoever looks like they're having trouble with a chipmunk, determined to save whoever he can from being kidnapped.

[yarrharr]

The chipmunk stares Geralt down with its expressionless, wall-eyed gaze, cheek containing a writhing, squirming, screaming passenger. The rodent watches Geralt in silence. A stand-off.

Do you feel lucky, Witcher?

[butcherofblaviken]

The Witcher flips the knife around in his fist. He can see the living passenger within. He's getting them out, chipmunk, even if he has to cut your cheek open.

Geralt springs at the chipmunk, death in his eyes. He can see his reflection in those big watery eyes, and he's clearly the monster in this fight. He brings the butcher knife around to stab it in the chipmunk's ear.

[yarrharr]

The butcher knife penetrates the chipmunk's skull and cuts into the rodent's tiny brain. It did not have time to fight back. It was a one-sided fight - no, a slaughter.

The chipmunk falls, and its jaws slacken. The passenger is free to crawl out of the chipmunk's mouth, or be cut out.

[dominateartimus]

When the group of enormous chipmunks swarm the room, San can't help but laugh at the sight of them. This had to be some sort of joke, right? But his laughter dwindles off when sees people being grabbed and gobbled up or stuffed in to fanny packs. Well then, this changes the situation drastically.

The fallen arch-angel slips off his jacket and tosses it on to a chair. It made combat a lot more easier with a lack of layers. He was never a fan of them in the first place. With that taken care of, he summons a glove with long sword-like nails and moves to attack the first chipmunk he sees.

[yarrharr]

The chipmunk rises on its hind legs to stand, paws out and at the ready.

If it's a slap-fight you want, it is a slap fight you'll get.

[dominateartimus]

It was laughable at how the large chipmunk rose to his challenge and didn't look intimidating at all. Except, he had no intentions of initiating a slap fight but to tear this creature apart in to a bloody mess. That included breaking bones as well.

His expression shifts to a more sinister one as he strikes one of the critter's joints.

[yarrharr]

Blades slice almost effortlessly through the delicate rodent flesh, a delayed screech of horror and pain as the chipmunk discovers that it now has a bloody, gushing stump where its paw used to be. However, its brain is so small, the chipmunk cannot fathom not being able to grip with both hands. It reaches forward to grab the passenger.

It bats at San with its stump.

[skyruleanhero]

Link had a second to contemplate the giant rodent, which to him wasn't all that odd Skyloft had Loftwings after all, and then lament on the fact that he had yet to get his weapons back before he took off running with a sharp curse. He needs to find something he can use to defend himself, a piece of wood as a shield or some sort of instrument to use as some sort of weapon.

Oh why did he take off his shield? He was practically useless without something! Maybe he could make a slingshot?

[yarrharr]

A chipmunk scampers after Link. It is a shame that he does not have is shield, as the rodent really would have enjoyed stuffing it in its other cheek. Instead, it just reaches out to grab Link, to pick him up, and to stuff him in its mouth.

It is good that the chipmunk does not know about the shield, however. If it did, it may have felt for the first time, regret.

[skyruleanhero]

Link let out a sharp curse and twisted into a roll, dodging to the side. Apparently fighting Ghirahim's minions in the name of Zelda-Hylia-Destiny had taught him something. He couldn't fight worth crap without a weapon of some sort in hand, but he could dodge like the best of them. At least until he ran out of breath.

"THIS IS WHY I WANTED MY SWORD BACK!" Link didn't quite yell so much as he shrieked as he took off running again. The minute he got the chance he was going to demand his weapons back because this was just insane. It didn't help that despite their size, they reminded him a bit of the Kikwi.

Terrifying, people eating Kikwi.

[needsnobottle]

This is so beyond the scope of Tammy's ability to deal. Up to this point in her life she thought the most dangerous thing to happen to her happened when she was a newborn. With meeting Cue and Lewis coming in a close second. But giant chipmunks who were--eating people, limbs bulging against their cheeks as people screamed and ran and generally panicked--broke Tammy's personal danger scale.

She's not a fighter. And the djinn isn't much of one, either.

So flee wins.

Tammy spins and bolts for the furthest edges of the room--other people are frantically banging on the locked doors so she knows better than to even join the crush--and slides under one of the tables.

She's turned into a horror-movie cliche, and that makes the imminent death all the worse.

[yarrharr]

As Tammy slides under one of the tables, her heavy, panicked breathing fills up the relative quiet of the dark space obscured by tablecloth.

But only for a moment.

The chipmunk beneath opens its jaws and reaches forth to accept this precious gift of passenger. She does not have the chance to even skid to a stop beneath the table before she is picked up and stuffed inside the rodent's cheek in one smooth movement.

For another small, fleeting moment, beneath the table is quiet again.

[needsnobottle]

Tammy's not sure how well anyone other than the chipmunk is going to hear her.

But that doesn't stop her from screaming anyway.

Three high, panicked shrieks, actually, her hands pressing out against moist cheeks that only expand with each of her frantic pushes as a tongue rasps against her side, tasting along the length of her spine, teeth pressing close against her body, testing her tenderness.

When she tries to draw the breath to scream again her throat closes with her terror, and her fingers claw desperately for some means of escape.

[dominateartimus]

The fallen arch-angel had been searching for Tammy when the chipmunks invaded the ship. He was using his senses to try and locate her but was receiving too much muddled information for him to make her and Antalyon out from the crowd. The next best thing he could use was his ears or start cutting apart every single chipmunk he comes across.

With a dull bladed weapon in hand, he moves about the room and calls out Tammy's name in a calm manner.

[thequeensown]

It had been several days since Talia had healed Logan, and she'd been resting as much as she could throughout those six days. The reaction headache had lasted almost two days, but she never complained, as it had been completely worth it to see that block gone.

She wasn't particularly quite up to attending a party, but like all the other guests of Captain Rowe, she'd found herself whisked away to it whether she wanted or not. The storm had wracked the boat and she'd done her best to help keep a sense of calm amongst those gathered.

And then the rodents had attacked and the passengers and crew set to motion, Talia included. She hadn't set out to kill any of the rodents, but she swiped up a serving knife in case she needed to defend herself. Hazel eyes cast about as chaos set in, seeking out some sign of Logan.